Assume that your child is struggling, not intentionally misbehaving. If my children were not autistic then that burden would not be there. Sorry, if your child has an intellectual disability, thats NOT autism. Well, bitch, because the normal child can do the most basic things in life. I want my children to have as easy ride as possible through life but, when you find out that your precious child is going to have to overcome obstacles, its hard to come to terms with. By not telling the truth about what its like to live with a child with severe autism, its painting an inaccurate picture and quite frankly, its counter productive. Right? To be honest? Still dressing and brushing teeth and feeding adult children that have no adaptive skills. And she cries because if she dies before he does she doesnt believe anyone will go to her childs funeral. No one here said to bottle it up. Because those of us with disabled children fear so fucking much. Its not wrong for an autistic child but okay for a neurotypical child. I do not post about this other than to help others in need. Write about your frustrations in a private journal. Forcing their disorders in the same category isnt helpful to anyone. I sincerely hope you are able to shelter him from that, but I need to tell you that its not guaranteed, and even if it is for your son, its not for every Autistic child. I think there is a point to this article, that a person can share too much, however, her idea that neurotypical parents do not share their struggles is absolutely ludicrousI see posts every day. Never around? Now the next layer Would your spouse talk about you that way? I dont think theres a right or a wrong here. Im one of the lucky high-functioning ones & even I was a burden to parent. everyone struggles and we all do and say things in the heat of the moment when tired, unhappy or stressed. This feels incredibly frustrating, and your child may act out. Surely you jest. I havent seen this particular video (dont plan to, either), but I see a lot of this stuff on Facebook, etc. My family couldnt cope with me anymore living at home and I now live in supported accommodation. I dont work, i dont drive, i shower once in a blue moon and im happy. Everyone is coming from a different perspective. Parenting is hard. Just because your life is manageable with your perfect authistic kid and 4 normal kids, does not mean it is the same for the rest of us. Parents dont want that for their children. No government services. You have NO CLUE what the hell you are talking about, sitting on your high functions autism perch and judging those of us whose lives are only lived to be caregivers to our severe children. For the love. Support ad love instead of judging and pointing fingers. My toddler doesnt eat on his own, he can not speak, he is violent, he screams as a form of communication, he likes to eat his poop, he bites and pinches and everything sets off a melt down. No such thing. Presumably, because no one would ever love her son enough to grieve when he dies. A LACK of empathy. We need to expose the lack of support,resources and services for this vulnerable population, hiding them is inmoral , this type of article enables ableism and discrimination. Is hard. Im all for people letting the horrible truth of autism hang out. Now, before you start throwing things at me, let me clarify. Work with other caregivers and teachers so that everyone uses the same approach. Make sure your child knows that you love them, autism and all. Compiled with ableist threats of suicide and counter congruent co-shaming its basically gaslighting. wash the parts where your hands feel natural. When you are crying and saying stuff like that it means you feel defeated and at a loss and wish things were easier rather than accepting that your childs differences make them unique. 6 Steps on Every Parent of an Autistic Childs Autism Journey, How to De-Escalate Your Childs Meltdown When Youre Triggered, Stop Telling Me You Arent Ableist and Start Doing This Instead, How to Recognize Youre Triggered in 4 Simple Steps, Sometimes My Kid's Autism Pokes My Autism Right in the Eye - Autistic Mama. You are the reason your son does those things. The second thing. No one elses. I can't wait to go to work each morning so I don't have to be around her. WWJD? Serious sleep problems. Its hard. Try to be consistent as best as you can. She is sharing her love and concern for her child with the world. Being non-speaking or intellectually disabled (those are VERY different things, by the way) doesnt negate that persons basic right to privacy, dignity, and respect. That is not what autism really is. Who in the world would want to have this struggle? feeling afraid to express emotions. I dont know. Just because she had a bad day (we all do), and decided to share her story, doesnt give you the right to bash her and make her out to be a bad person. You make money off your childs Autism, but have the nerve to try and shame another mom. None of us are perfect but clearly your social media skills need improving because you are trolling the wrong people: advocates for improvement in autism services, education and supportservices which you could benefit from if you honestly cannot see how mean and misguided your insults are. Then I went no contact with my mother. The world cannot see those or understand them unless they know someone going through it. 217K subscribers in the autism community. I am really confused by the attacks and accusations on other parents of children with autism in this article and in some of the comments as trying to monetize their child (an abhorrent concept and characterization of one mom trying to help another) especially when I read this: Would you assume that no one besides you would ever care about your child? Next time you fall into bed after wrestling your autistic child into clothes, away from danger, taking their meds and into bed, and you let out an ugh, that was hard! Lets hope the mom-bullies are not around to bash you for complaining!! Now that we have that out of the way, lets get to the meat of it. Read with caution. Hes making a pretty clear statement, tbh. Sorry as a teacher I have to jump in here. EVERYONE. I dont think parents so much mourn their childrens potential achievements as their potential lack of choices. The more issues you have (like autism) the harder and more difficult life becomes. My God are you OK? 1.2K views, 26 likes, 31 loves, 56 comments, 42 shares, Facebook Watch Videos from Michael Mirdad: Humility versus Grandiosity -- Friday Night Spiritual. His reading comprehension is not even at a 1st grade level. He sleeps with a stuffed animal every night (and I could use one too). Changing a 5, 10, 15, 20 year olds diapers because they dont have the ability to be potty trained. I guess you conveniently forgot to leave that part out, because it doesnt fit your narrative. Its unbelievable to me how selfish these women are. Do you have any experience with severe autism? This is one point that I dont think many parents consider, but the fact is that the world is watching you. It is important to understand these rights to ensure that you or your child is being treated fairly and given access to all of the services and supports to which you are entitled. Outside of the internet hardly anyone cares, people in the general public rarely understand, you as the parent are the villain and without resources and constant intervention paired with routine it is Hell. It is part of human nature. (Because yall can hold down a job?) It is an insult to momsplain that behavior is communication. Maybe that lady crying in her car about how hard her life is bc of autism had to the same thing everyday for the last week. Special door locks and alarms on every door because the same severe individual can, and will, elope, whenever possible. And I cant tell you their future except to say that I will always be their cheerleader and I will always see their achievements as more important as their failures. Even if you have people in your life to talk to, they dont necessarily want to here a repeat of your ongoing frustration. Older autistic children may enjoy setting up their toys in scenes. Big deal. Some objective points, but the majority was a joke. If youve never raised a severely autistic learning disabled child then you have no right to chastine parents who have. There are plenty of schools now educational programs for your artistic kids, most of the kids at artistic today you cant even tell because theyre in such great programs. My parents are far from perfection, but if they made something like this to me I would publicly shame them back and/or kill myself. But his cousins probably will. If we wouldnt want our spouse talking about us in a certain way, we shouldnt talk about our child that way. If I refuse thats a meltdown. Insurance companies and schools are repeat offenders, and they are tired! You dont want to believe the severely autistic even exist let alone cause their parents heartbreak. When you say that autism makes your life so difficult, youre telling the world that autistic people are more trouble than were worth. Consistency makes it clear that you mean what you say. Occasionally posts contains other affiliate links as well. our children already have enough to deal with day and night. When pushed to do something they don't want to do, your child may throw a fit. Im pretty sure every parent has had a rant about their childrens behaviour before! Implementing a new routine can be difficult, so be patient. Let the woman tell her story. And I have yet to have a single class without a child with austim most have several. Is she not allowed to have one? All you know is what you see in others. we all have to try to make our childrens lived less stressful. ASD is called a spectrum for a reason. And thats what youve got to understand. Does it mean we love our children any less?! Try to incorporate small fish, meats, fish oil, and cod liver oil into your childs diet. We know how other people perceive us, we know we are different, we know that people treat us in a different way. Make it clear that you care about what's bothering them, even if you don't know what it is. Her concerns are real. I am just the carer. Life will chew you up and spit you out and the more issues you personally have the harder it will become to handle life at its worst. Its very hard for people who have no issues. Some children may have low self esteem especially when the parents whom they trust in frustration write negative about their own children. You only know the world of high functioning ASD/Aspergers. So did my husband. You are coming off extremely judgmental and rude. Take a seat. Ive treated my oldest the same as my youngest and guess whather counselor said my daughter is learning empathy which is surprising to her. Dreaming about them becoming valedictorian and getting into a great college, Going to med school Choosing a specialty You dreamed it all before your child was even born. Class without a child with the world is watching you it is makes your life to talk to they! 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